Sunday, June 20, 2010

at night.

I have been wanting to blog on numerous topics lately, but its sooooo much, that I don't really know where to start.

As most people know, I am a very sensitive person. Not sensitive, like over-emotional, but sensitive in the way that the plight of the suffering really touches my heart.

The past couple of nights....I have tossed and turned over so many issues that I feel completely helpless against. Just to name a few....human-trafficking, sexual-slavery, child abuse, the orphan, sick and suffering babies and children.......human rights......genocide....

I have this checklist of things that I pray for, and what happens is that I get sooooo sick from all the injustice in the world, that it consumes me! I won't sleep, or can't sleep, because I can't stop thinking about it. I toss and turn and toss and turn. And, I can't stop feeling so completely and utterly HELPLESS !

I hate it. It makes me sick. To know that somewhere out there, a helpless child is being abused and neglected. To know that somewhere out there, people are jailed and even murdered due to their sexual preference. To know that heartless criminals profit from the sale of of human lives...

Several years ago, I did a pretty intense research project on human trafficking. It blew my mind. I have no words to describe what I've learned. No words. That project fueled me....it made me want to learn more. It forced me to open my eyes. It pulled me out of my safe little haven and made me care more than I thought I could!

And, now, I lie awake at night feeling helpless, heartbroken, and enraged.

I know I'm a sensitive being. But, is this normal? I don't know. I'm sick of feeling helpless. I want to help. I want to change lives! I am just not sure how!